I’m Not So Sure

Everyone has been whining about the economy for quite some time now. I even started to worry myself. Then it occurred to me that I have worked through a recession before. Or so I’d heard.

Honestly, I don’t know what I ever did without the Internet! I sat down and looked it up. I found not only the official definition of “recession” but also a handy timeline illustrating our country’s economic history.

We ain’t in one folks. In fact, it turns out that the last time everyone was so concerned about the economy, we weren’t in one then either. Which ought to be good news — except that so many people are so worried about it that if someone doesn’t call the cops to bust up this national pity party soon we’re going to have a real reason for it.

I say these things and inevitably someone mentions that the media is the driving force behind the notion that things are worse than they are. Oh, that evil media, huh? Man have we come a long way from the ideals of Clark Kent — from that image of reporters as uncorruptible (“I’ll never reveal my sources!”) upholders of Truth, Justice, and the American Way to today’s despicable, bottom-feeding vermin seeking to propagandize and manipulate through misinformation. You know, except when they want to interview us, then they’re OK.

Well my friends, the media is not the culprit; we make our own destiny. The media is comprised of businesses trying to make a buck just like you and me. They sell stories. They run the stories that make them the most money — and we love to fear for the worst. So it should surprise none of us that we keep hearing about how awful things are.

Nevertheless, it’s true, some industries are having a particularly bleak period and that does affect many people in a trickle-down sort of way that eventually shows up as Maggie not having to go to work till 4:00 in the afternoon on what used to be her busiest day of the week.

Hmm. Perhaps I should market to reporters?

But wait! This isn’t even the rant I was planning on going off on! I was going to tell you about how I don’t think there are really that many openings available in the beauty industry.

That’s right. I’m backing Mark Twain on this one: “...there are three kinds of lies: lies, damn lies, and statistics.” And I’m blaming statistics for leading us to believe that all these phantom positions are open.

We’ve been hearing it for a long time; there are more openings for salon professionals than there are salon professionals to fill them.

I was thinking about this the other day after one of our hairstylists got her name in print in our local paper when she was interviewed for an article about increased enrollment in the local beauty schools due to the supposed recession. Then I thought about those two salons up in Selma with signs in front of their windows offering full set specials. I thought about the holes in my own schedule.

It certainly doesn’t seem like Jane Q. Public is having a hard time getting her nails done.

No, instead I offer the possibility that salon owners report having openings not because they have a list of clients waiting for another staff member to come on board so much as because there are so many booth rental salons. A salon owner might have six nail stations in her salon and only two of those might be filled. When the surveys come out, that salon owner says she has four openings for new nail techs. When those statistics hit us, it sounds a lot like there’s a salon owner out there desperately waiting to hire us — mentor and mold us — to fill our appointment books with eager, paying clients.

It’s not like that though, is it?

I fear the recent article in the local paper (There’s that media tie-in. Whew. I wasn’t sure I could pull it off!) focuses on this misconception. It seems that soon our area will experience a surge of newly licensed manicurists and cosmetologists knocking on salon doors to take their chance at making it in this business. Many of those salon doors will open graciously to them — at the going rate of about $150+ a week for stylists and $100 a week for nail techs, and all this eager new talent will shortly fall by the wayside. Many of them will just end up feeding the local tech school even more money when they enroll in another program that looks profitable in the brochure. (Note to self: Also get more employees from tech school as clients.)