I understand that most normal people do not live lives of constant adventure and intrigue. For most of us, our daily lives consist of work, home, sleep, lather, rinse, repeat. Weekends might involve a barbeque or a camping trip. When you return to your regularly scheduled nail appointment in two weeks, you might not feel like you have a good story to tell.

Especially if you have been returning every two weeks for nail appointments with the same nail tech for 15 years.

Well. I can’t have enough adventures for all of us! My clients need to step up their game.

This is a helluva busy time of year for me. I’m not off galavanting around the globe every weekend. I’m so busy with clients during the week that I don’t have time to get the non-client work chores done, like banking and supply shopping. The BF hardly sees me anymore, between him having to be at work by 8 a.m. and me not getting home till 9:30 p.m. Our weekends are spent trying to keep the house clean, the bills paid, the refrigerator stocked, and the dogs “desqueaked” (which means playing with them until they are too worn out to whine at us).

I’ve been filing in silence a lot these last few weeks. That is not like me. Some people want to have their nails done in peace and quiet, without all that blather from a nail tech who expects them to pay attention to her...those are not my clients. My clients are accustomed to a nail lady who won’t shut up. And their nail lady expects that if they aren’t going to be listening to me talk through their appointment, then they had better have a better story.

No one has stories lately. No one wants to hear me tell them about a weekend trip to Costco, or how I need to move the Roomba’s home base so that it spends more time behind my desk each night. (Roomba in the salon FTW, btw!)

On the other hand, they all insist that they have nothing new to report to me. That despite not seeing me for two to three weeks, nothing has happened to them that they can think to talk about.

How can that be? Normal people go to work every day and still manage to have something to talk about with their families at the end of the day. So how can people not have anything worth talking about after two weeks of not seeing me?

I just tell them to make something up. Just tell me a story. Or tell me about what they watch on TV (especially since I don’t watch TV). Or what book they’re reading…something.

I feel terrible not talking during appointments. It makes me feel like I’m ignoring my clients. If they don’t talk to me, I feel like they aren’t enjoying their visit.

I guess I’ll just make up my own stories to tell them, then. I hear werewolves are popular. I wonder how long it’ll take my clients to remember something to talk about once they have to listen to me ramble on about werewolves?